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1 entry categorized "Lost in Translation"

June 09, 2009

Suicide Watch

Suicide Watch

This is what happened at the salon yesterday afternoon.

Suicide Watch

Two minutes into the head massage, boom outta nowhere...

Shampooist: Sir, huwag po kayo magagalit sa akin.
Translation: Sir, please don't be mad at me.

Me: Bakit naman?
Translation: Why's that?

Shampooist: Alam nyo po, masama po yan ginagawa ninyo sa sarili niyo. Hindi po maganda yan.
Translation: You know, what you're doing to yourself is terrible. That's not good.

Me: Ha?
Translation: Huh?

Shampooist: Hindi po yan ang solusyon sa problema ninyo. Kasalanan po yan. Kukunin po kayo ni lord sa tamang panahon.
Translation: It's not the solution to your problems. It's a sin. God will take you at the right time.

Me: Ano yan pinagsasasabi mo?
Translation: What the hell are you saying?

(shampooist pointed to my wrist)

Me: GAGA KA! KINALMOT AKO NG BAGONG KUTING NAMIN!!!!
Translation: DUMBASS! OUR NEW KITTEN SCRATCHED ME!!!!

Shampooist: Ayyy sorry po.
Translation: Oh sorry.

Windang. Tambling. Hindi ko lang siya kinaya.

I think my hair stylist must be fuming at me right this second for tipping the shampooist five times what I tipped her.

Patnubayan sana sila ng poong maykapal.


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