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2 entries categorized "Daria the Pooch"

October 31, 2005

Rest in Peace Daria, Life Went On, Show Me Some Lovin' Lovin'

Rest in Peace, Daria.

Daria_1Rest in peace, my baby. You've been here for a little over a month but Daria but you brought so much joy and happiness in my household. I terribly miss you. It was completely my FAULT. I tried to save your fragile life but I made a wrong decision in the process. I wish I have sent you to a different veterinarian instead of the one who said you have kidney and liver problems. I wish I didn't allow you to be confined at their clinic - they made the wrong decision to put you on dextrose,  causing you to bloat. I wish I could turn back the clocks and brought you to an acquaintance's referral. I just hate you being gone!

I terribly, terribly miss you babe. I tried to avoid conversations with people over the past few days because I thought I could pretend to put a straight face and play numb... but I just can't do it anymore.

I know it's too late for me to tell you this. AT FIRST, I thought I'd get you from the breeder simply because you were so beautiful, small and I wanted a "toy". I originally wanted a small dog for "novelty purposes" - a dog to pamper based on my selfish needs and not YOUR real needs, a dog to dress up and be seen with etc. My original intentions to get you were based on pure selfishness.

But I fell in love with you a few days after we met. You became my only best friend. I've put my own personal gain and selfishness aside because I know you deserved to be loved and cared for. You're not just for "now", you're a companion for life.

Words cannot express my sadness or how I truly feel. I am so sorry for irresponsibly taking your life away from you. I love you - you will always be remembered and I will never forget you.

(This message goes out to my readers: I know you guys are a nice bunch but I would appreciate it if you don't say/ask me anything in regards to Daria's death. I'd like to thank you, in advance, for YOUR condolences - I hope y'all understand. This is one of my personal flaws - I tend to play MUTE, DEAF and BLIND when it comes to personal problems. It's a nasty, permanent flaw, unfortunately...)

Life Went On

Don't I deserve an Academy award for putting up a fake face over the weekend in spite of Daria's death a few days ago?

Errr.. iIt wasn't a fake face actually; I *DID* have a lot of fun.

It felt like as if I had a huge lump in my throat and the only way to numb myself from feeling such lump is through copious amount of alcohol, make-up and clothes that a transvestite prostitute would be proud of.

I think I'll stick to my 2-year old breedless, classless, "domestic short-haired" cat, Pinkie. I don't want to waste any more lives at my EXPENSE.

I have a heart too, you know... 138/90 and 92 beats per minute.

Errands

I got up at 5:30AM earlier this morning and left the house at around 7:00AM to do some errands.

I quickly dropped by at my gal pal's place and had some early morning gossip. Went to Starbucks afterwards, had a latte and drove back to my aesthetician's clinic only to find out that they're closed because of the All Saint's/Souls Day holiday season.

Show Me Some Lovin' Lovin'

Here are a couple of fan pics for you to point your fingers at and laugh. Thank you, thank you, thank YOU! Bryanboy loves you all and like what I said before, if only I can give you sexual favors, I would.

Meet Thom from the UK. Here I am thinking an extra "H" on one's name is a very Filipino trait but little had I known it also exists halfway across the world.

Thom darling, I give you A+ for effHort.

Thom

You gotta love those kids in Singapore doing the Bryanboy pose. My god, the Philippine Embassy in Singapore should have a fucking BRASS MONUMENT of ME with my pose.

Worship me! All of you! I want y'all to put your left hand on your waist and your right arm in the air!

Lukeandaaron_1 

Asssss6

Last but not the least, Bryanboy loves people from Malaysia, especially Malaysian schoolkids.

Malaysia, Truly Asia!

Malaysia

Malaysia1

Malaysia2

Bryanboy Loves... and Random Cheesemax

Hasselhoffianrecursion_1 #1 - Bryanboy loves people from Seaside, CA, Bombay, India, Paris, France, Queenstown Estate, Singapore, Valencia, CA, Maylands, WA, Australia, San Francisco, CA, Markham, ONT, Canada, Newmarket, QLD and of course, people from Copenhagen, Denmark. Bryanboy loves you all! Identify yourselves, bitches and say HI!.

#2 - Whenever I go out in public, I always take a quick trip to the toilets every once in a while to smell my armpits.

Being the complete sweaty betty that I am (trust me, in this weather, even a trivial thing such as BREATHING NORMALLY can make me sweat), I know I'm NOT the record-breaking, best-smelling person in the world so I do make the effort to lift my arms up, shove my nose to my pits and figure out whether or not my armpits stink -- IN PRIVATE.

(BTW: Thank god my pits don't usually get wet. It's my PALMS and forehead that's my problem.)

Anyway, rumor has it that there's this one person locally who doesn't seem to care (or at least make an effort) about his/her armpits. It's not the first time I heard such gossip about ____. It's quite sad that people talk about this person about that BO problem but NOBODY has the balls to confront that person - I know I CAN'T... cause I have a vagina.

But then again, who am I to judge when I haven't really smelled that person?

If you think I have body odour or bad breath (guilty as charged, especially when I go out - I love oysters and booze - perfect recipe for halitosis!), please send an anonymous (or NOT SO) anonymous tip via www.sendatip.com. I invite you to send a tip to THAT person, i HOPE he knows who he is, so they'll know what's going on without revealing yourself.

I still can't do it AND I won't do it either... though I guess it would look as if it came from me because I posted that website URL on my blog. LOL.

Patsy Stone once said "one whiff of a cocoa bean and our customers would fly like vampires before garlic."

I don't want to be that coca bean. I'm sure NOBODY does.

But this person that I'm talking about is worse than cocoa bean AND garlic, COMBINBED!

Oh I don't know what to think anymore.

I love you all! As always, you know how to get hold of me. Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63-915-7851492.

Baboosh!

October 13, 2005

Damn Daria, Coco Cool, Shopping Shopping (Again)

Damn Daria

Does anyone know how Daria Werbowy got potty trained as a child?

Daria

I'm having the worst time of my life training my bitch, Daria (pictured above), when it comes to excretion. My little baby of a pooch ruined far too many bed sheets and rugs with her piss and shit - literally.

My room smells that of dog poo and no amount can air freshener and lysol can remove the disgusting smell.

Trust me love,  I don't HAVE a sense of smell yet I know how my dog's pee smells like.

I've been thinking of going to a fucking sex shop just to buy a damn butt plug. You know, get her some double chitty chitty bang bang action on both of her orifices.

If you live in the capital of the land of the brown, the l'exotique and the natives and know of a good puppy school/dog trainer, please let me know.

Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63-9157851492. Preferably in the Alabang area, unless your dog school has a luxury shuttle service. My pooch refuses to ride a bus.

I'm a loving person. Seriously. I love animals. I really do. Fuck, I even support the fur industry. That's how I love animals. Do you even know how hard it is to maintain fur in the third world when a thing such as "fur storage" is nonexistent?

Anyway, I can't do the old-school way of spanking your puppy and rubbing their faces on their feces. Yuck.

My mom told me all it takes is a little time and patience but those two words does NOT exist on my dictionary.

Time and patience my fucking ass - she once told me that when I used to play with my OWN shit in my crib back when I was a breastfeeding infant.

Ick. Terrible mental picture I'm telling you.

Coco Cool

I finally found some spare time lying on the floor earlier.

I'm telling you, I am sooo gonna be nouveaux poor next year, especially with the latest accesswah from Chanel.

THIS IS MY NEW HANDBAG RIGHT THERE. I'M TELLING YOU - I'LL BE THE FUTURE OWNER OF THAT BAG!!!!!!!!!

Chanel_1

I really, really, really like that bag... and the little charm on it. I'm not too keen on the bracelet though.

The bag is sooo mine it's not even funny.

In fact, this me NEXT YEAR... sans the red skirt suit. Ick. I like the shoes though. Gorgeous.

Mewearingchanel

Next!

Ok, this bag is kinda cute at first glance. However, upon closer inspection, it looks like something that belonged to the Cabbage Patch kids. Yuck.

Chanel2

The gold clutch is cute. What can it hold though? Boy George's 13 grams of cocaine?

Chanelgold

Now this is something I like. Hardcore hardware at its finest.

Chanelnecklace

Shopping Shopping (Again)

4 more weeks before I embark on my fall/winter escapade and here I am stuck with no clothes to wear.

After much contemplation while having an abortion at the toilet bowl earlier, I have 2 options:

a) Buy a ton of clothes and accessories before I leave. Who cares about excess luggage - at least I'll have all my outfits ready. Hats, scarves, tops, trousers, coats, belts, shoes and of course, handbags. Even if I'm not gonna use ALL of them. At least all my suitcases are packed to the max, leaving me NO space for shopping (which means I'll be saving money). No shopping means more time for me to channel my inner Dora the Explorer.

or

b) Buy a few more items (just a few more, to satisfy my thirst) and then bring a huge suitcase filled with empty bags only to fill them up in Beijing. Screw the Great Wall of China (although I've always wanted to go there). Why go to the Great Wall when I can stock up on a ton of real fur garments - chinchilla, mink, fox, rabbit, nutria, beaver, coyote, sable, lynx, kid, goat, you name it, they got it.

I think I'll go on a massive web hunt and see what I can buy. Gotta flex my plastic's muscles baby.

I've been lusting over this coat for the past 3 months now. I think this is what a good autumn coat is made of. Coat made by Chloe, € 2295.00 at Luisa Via Roma. Unfortunately, it's only available in navy and not in black. I like it in black though, not Navy.

Chloecoat

Bryanboy Loves... and Random Cheesemax

Demi #1 - Bryanboy loves people from Hillsdale, MI, Long Beach, CA, New York, NY, Ubbhult, Sweden, De Valk, Netherlands, Loomis, CA, Lemon Grove, CA (my god, quite a ton of Californians today eh?) Rahway, NJ, Montvale, NJ, Wayzata, Minnesota (who knew such city existed?) and of course, people from Kingsford, Michigan. Bryanboy loves y'all! Identify yourselves bitches and say hello!

#2 - That Demi Moore bitch looks pretty. I like her lips on that cover of Vogue Paris. Gorgeous. Fucking gorgeous. If she keeps on getting prettier and prettier I may consider plastic surgery.

#3 - I better start working on my article. I have 2 articles to write, one is way, way overdue and I have another one due next week.

#4 - Calling all self-tan fanatics. Has any one of you tried the new Dior Bronze range? I mean, I know they changed packaging, but have they changed what's inside those magic tubes? I've been thinking of buying a couple of tubes at Eluxury.com (Shimmering Glow Body Self-Tanner is priced at $27).

#5 - I've booked myself for a facial later this afteroon. My face needs some tender loving bittersweet torture. Can't wait.

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As always, you know where to contact me. Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63-915-7851492.

I love you all.

Baboosh!

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