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March 09, 2005

Attack of the freeloading golden-aged wrinkly vintage matrons!

What a colourful day today was.

After having only 3 hours of sleep, I got up at 9:25AM today because I had an appointment with my ISP's tech support engineers. I've been experiencing slow internet connections the past few weeks and they had to come to my office to fix the broadband modem. The tech support guy was freaky -- a 6-foot-plus tall skinny ogre (a common sight these days amongst Filipino youth) spent 2 hours fixing all sorts of stuff on my computer... and modem.

When he fixed the thing, he told me to go to various sites I'm having problems with. First site on my list was the Dior website where I want to view the Fall/Winter 05/06 show.

God knows what's inside his mind -- gay overload or what? It doesn't help me wearing my tank top and neon pink juicy coutures. Comfy house clothes, cut me some slack -- it wasn't even noon. What did he expect?

Nope, no go. Connection was still slow. He then spent a few minutes changing some settings, blah blah. Then he told me to go to www.nba.com since that site has a "lot of graphics".

You should've seen the smirk on his face when I

gave him the shock-awe-and-horreur look on mine.

No way in hell I'm gonna corrupt and taint my oh-so-loyal computer with imagery from the alien, basketball kind.

After 5 seconds of sheer and genuine thought, I followed his command and entered www.nba.com. Took no more than 5 seconds to load the page. High speed is back!

I crawled back to bed to catch up on my beauty sleep only to get up again at 3:30PM. I had to do my facial at 5:30PM and I need flex my plastic.

Sister, his fag best friend and I, got to the mall at around 5:00PM. Spent 30 minutes roaming around and found some nice bracelets. Decided buy them some other time -- we smoked marlboros instead. Had my facial at exactly 5:30, finished at 6:17PM.

When I went to the counter to pay my invoice, some golden-aged, wrinkly, vintage woman who I shall name MatronAirForce 1, went in front of me to ask the cashier if she could have ANOTHER free umbrella. My doctor's clinic give these freebies -- either an umbrella or a bag to anyone who buys the $400 Obagi Skincare system.

They weren't even special -- when I first started Obagi, I got this blue mesh beach bag/tote that I haven't even used -- it was tackier than tack.

The cashier said "sorry, we can't give you another umbrella cause we already gave you one. these umbrellas are being audited and it's on limited inventory. we can only give 1 umbrella to each new customer. sorry!"

Golden-aged wrinkly woman's response was: "So? just another extra umbrella won't hurt and maybe you can put someone else's name there, please pretty please?" -- at this point she put this pity dog i'm-begging look on her face.

Cashier said "sorry."

When the woman left, cashier shook her haid and said "unbelievable".

I told her "that woman is crazy!"

After signing my credit card charge slip, I quickly went to my sister's fag best friend Joey who was waiting for me outside the clinic to share gossip.

Joey then told me that the nutcase woman was there in the clinic with 2 other golden-age wrinkly vintage matron nutcases. Apparently it wasn't just the free umbrellas they were going after.

The other 2 non-paying, non-clinic, non-Obagi, "we're-just-here-because-we're-with-MatronAirForce 1" friends were going gaga about the free tote bags too.

The staff gave them the free bags AND the free umbrellas simply because MatronAirForce 1 bought Obagi. MatronAirForce 2 even asked if she can have another bag to give to another friend who wasn't with them.

The horror didn't stop there.

My doctor's clinic put these huge plastic butterfly things on their paperbag handles for decoration.

Butterfly

When MatronAirForce 2 and MatronAirForce 3 saw MatronAirForce 1's paperbag, they both went gaga about the butterflies and asked the staff if they could each have em.

Not only they all got a butterfly, they got them

in EVERY color too.

It really was unbelievable. It was the attack of the freeloading golden-aged, wrinkly vintage matrons.

All this freeloading talk reminds me of the the time when I witnessed a scandal in a hotel in Manila when I checked out. Some middle-aged woman loudly asked her daughter to cover up her huge tote bag because the striped towels they stole were peeking out of the bag. When the hotel receptionist told them they weren't supposed to take out the towels, the old woman said "well we spent 2 nights in this hotel, we're entitled to take whatever we want. we paid for our stay."

This sort of attitude is rampant amongst middle-aged women in this country. Unbelievable.

Juicy gossip aside, sis, Joey and I went to Dior counter today after my facial with my doctor to buy another 2 tubes of clear lip gloss only to find out it's sold out -- again -- for the umpteenth week this year, considering they get weekly replenishments from the powers that be. Looks like Sephora.com will get my business. Again.

My sister suggested that I try something else. I was rather hesitant because Dior clear lip gloss has been tried, tested and bears the bryanboy stamp of approval over the years.

She tugged me to go to the nearby Chanel counter and we tried various stuff out. For years, I've avoided Chanel cosmetics and skincare stuff because my sister uses them and I've always thought Chanel lippies etc is for really girly girly girls and for mothers. Both my mom and my younger sister use Chanel and I find their stuff utterly boring.

It looks like they didn't have a 100% clear, see-through lip gloss like Dior or Versace. The girl handed me this long tube to try out. I puckered up, applied a thin coat on my lips and puckered up again in front of the mirror. The first word that came to my mind was... MAGIC!

Chanel

I was rather surprised because when you look at the tube, the gloss itself looks rather odd... with a very very light gray color because of the microglitters in it. When put on your lips, it gives it a clear, soft and shiny finish. It's NOT GLITTERY AT ALL, JUST PURE CLEAR SHINE! Not as ultra high voltage shine as Dior though. I have to admit I'm kinda disappointed because the gloss itself wasn't sticky, this means I have to constantly reapply when I'm out. I have this thing about sticky glossies -- even if I hate sticky, it's quite good because it lasts for awhile. I'm definitely not the butchest person around but sticky lip glosses are good for faggots who want to use lip gloss but do not want to bring their tubes with them and reapply because they don't want people to think they're using/carrying lip gloss.

Anyway, all things aside, I love it. Since I was there, I bought a case of bronze illuminator/highlighter to replace my Nars one. The highlighter is nice too cause it gives your skin (particularly on your cheek bones) a natural bronze glow.

At the rate I'm getting fat these days, I'd do anything I can to salvage any traces of my cheek bones.

Try the lip gloss. The color is 43 - Crystal Blue.

On our way out from the department store, Joey saw the 3 MatronAirs. come in. We all had a laugh, telling each other that they should lock up and hide all the tester make ups -- these MatronAirs might ask to keep them.

Oh... and...

"Where's the tube top section?"

Enjoy!

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